Sunday, February 25, 2007

OK! OK!! An Update!!

I'm sorry for not posting sooner since the caseworker visit this last Wednesday! Every time I wanted to sit down and post, I'd either end up busy doing something else, or I'd get distracted by things.

The visit went very well! This caseworker that came by this time was one that had we'd never met before. She is the adoption worker, and we found out that she will be the ONLY caseworker from here on out. YAY! She's a very nice, pleasant, older lady, and she explained things to us very well as far as what is going to happen.

We received all of the "disclosure information" that DHS has had on file pertaining to each of the girls. The file on Destiny is at least 2 inches thick, and Meghan's is about half of that. Made for quite a bit of reading...but a lot of it we already knew. According to my MIL, when the adoption becomes final we will get even MORE files from DHS. Can't wait to see everything, including whatever was said about us!

Then we had to sign a bunch of new paperwork...mostly stuff we've done before, just updated. One of the papers pertained to what the girls' new names will be once they are adopted. :) Meghan's name will be changed completely...I don't care for the name she legally has now, and she'll never know until she's older that it was ever anything besides Meghan. For Destiny, we are changing the spelling of her first name (legally it is Destanie) and giving her a new middle name. Their last names are already the same as ours. Also, there will be entirely new birth certificates issued, with their new names, and OUR names listed as the Mother and Father. I know I am just going to cry the first time I see that!!

As for a finalization date, there isn't one yet. The caseworker said that at the very latest, this should all be done by March! She said around 30-45 days at the most. The lawyer will be the one to set the date, and one of the things we need to do now is get in touch with him and tell him that she's been here and it's time to get things rolling. He will get the necessary information and then file the petition for adoption. MIL had the same lawyer, and she told me that she thinks that after they'd got to this point and the lawyer was involved, that it was maybe two weeks later and they were in the courtroom for the finalization. :)

Oh, speaking of court...remember the judge that we'd had? The one that was so biased regarding the smoking thing? Well, we found out that she is no longer on the case...she now works downtown or something...I don't really care! I'm very glad we don't have to deal with her again! There's a new judge, and the caseworker said he/she (I can't remember which) is very good and fair.

SO...the gist of it is, that this really will all be over soon!! I thrilled, excited, anxious and nervous all in one! It will be such a relief to finally be free of all the red tape, and the fear that my girls might be taken away from me! Yes, it's been a very long, difficult road...but it's SO worth it. I'm kinda glad my brother-in-law and his girlfriend are such screw-ups. If they weren't...I wouldn't have had this chance to be a Mom. You have NO idea just how much this means to me.

Friday, February 16, 2007

'Nuff Said...

Adoption Update!!

We heard from our adoption caseworker yesterday. She will be coming out to our house on Wednesday with some FINAL paperwork for us to sign, and for a visit with the girls. We will hopefully also get a finalization date for the adoption!!

WAHOOOOOOO!!! Keep your fingers crossed that this lonnnnng process is almost OVER!

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

On This Day 12 Years Ago...

I married my best friend!

We met when I was 19 and he was 21. We knew each other, but didn't really KNOW each other, since we were both always in other relationships, and were too shy to really talk.

Years later, when my boyfriend at the time had gone into the Navy, he was my shoulder to cry on when I felt alone. We got to know each other a lot more, and the more time I spent with him, the more I knew that the guy I was with was not the right man for me.

We ended up falling in love, and on February 14, 1995, after dating less than a year, we got married. I was 23, and he was 25. I have never been happier!

The past year has brought us even more challenges than the last. We've been struggling to complete the adoption of our daughters...both his Mom and Dad have been so sick, Dad with cancer and diabetes, and Mom with brain tumors...Together, we can face anything that might be thrown our way!

To my husband:
Baby, I love you more today than the day I married you. I am truly in love with my best friend!

You are my light, my love, my reason for very best friend. I know we'll have many more happy years together, they should be even happier now that we have a family of our own. We tried so hard for so long to have children, and even though it didn't happen as we expected it to, we now have two beautiful little girls to call ours.

Happy Anniversary Darlin'! I LOVE YOU!!

Alison Krauss- "When You Say Nothing at All" (See the video right below this post!'s "our" song.)

It's amazing how you can speak right to my heart
Without saying a word you can light up the dark
Try as I may I could never explain
What I hear when you don't say a thing

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all

All day long I can hear people talking out loud
But when you hold me near, you drown out the crowd
Old Mr. Webster could never define
What's being said between your heart and mine

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Alison Krauss - When You Say Nothing At All

This is "our" song. :)

Fun With Laundry Baskets

Meghan is 22 months old today! In just a couple of months she will be *gasp!* 2 years old! It just doesn't seem possible. Should be a very interesting year. :)

My Mom-in-law stopped by a couple nights ago to pick up some laundry that I was doing for her, and Meghan discovered the fun of playing with a laundry basket:

Saturday, February 10, 2007


Why, why, WHY do I continually let myself be taken advantage of?? Why do I try to give a person even a little of my trust, only to have them do things to disrespect me and hurt me again and again??

WHEN will I reach a breaking point, just completely do something out of the ordinary for me and just finally lose my cool?? When is enough, enough???

Ugh. I hate this.

Out of the Mouth of Meghan

Meghan will be 22 months old on the 13th. She is saying more and more words all the time, and probably a whole bunch that I just haven't been able to translate from her "toddler-speak" yet. I thought I'd make a little record of things she does say on a regular basis nowadays. Of course, some are of the obvious persuasion, but I was curious as to just how big her vocabulary is so far.

See...usually said quite loudly and excitedly.
No...but comes out more like "Ooooh"
All gone...comes out like "Ah gah"
Bye...she actually said this one for the first time last night! Before that, "Hi" stood for both hi and bye.
Papa (well, kinda!)
Yay...sounds more like "Aaaaaa" and usually claps her hands at the same time.
"Shew shew"...said while wrinkling her nose and waving her hand in front of her face. She gets that from me, since I would say it a lot and make the motion when changing a stinky diaper.
Please....sounds like "peas"...she's got looking cute down with this one! She'll cock her head to the side when she says it. LOL
Thank you...sounds like "Ain goo"

Hmmmm...unfortunately that's all I can come up with right now. 20 words? At 22 months? Really?? I have no idea if that's average or not. I'll have to look that up. But man...she is ALWAYS talking it seems. I'm sure she's got lots more words that I'm just not understanding yet.

She still communicates a lot with, I guess you could say, "grunts" and gestures. She does use intonation on some words, particularly "Mama". If she's a little aggravated or disappointed about something it will sound like "Maaaa Ma!" Of course if she really wants my attention, she says it very loudly!

What else? Oh, whenever I am listening to music, she "sings" along, though in her own words. So cute! She will also try to count...she mimics the sounds of the numbers, and sometimes even knows what comes next! She's very, very bright. She's followed complex directions for many months now, like "Get your diaper and put it in the trash." or "Get your binky and put it in your bed". Destiny, at 4 years old, STILL has problems with complex instructions sometimes. Not always, but sometimes. But this post isn't about that.

It's just been an amazing 21 or so months for me. (Remember she was already 3 weeks old when I got her.) I have loved (almost!) every minute of it...watching her grow and change, and accomplish new things all the time. I'm SO thankful that I've had the chance to be a Mommy to the baby I tried so long and hard to have myself that never happened. She has helped so much with filling that emptiness that's been in my heart and arms for over a decade. Oh, I still hope and dream of someday getting pregnant and having a child of my own...but I'm 35 now. In my head I know that my chances are growing ever slimmer, and I try not to dwell on it too much. The longing, the void, is still's just not as immense as it was before.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Happy Hour Playdates??

Mary from over at "It's Not All Mary Poppins" had a post on this subject a couple days ago, and I've been thinking about it every since. I've been surfing around for different posts on the subject, and there are kept me occupied with reading for quite awhile.

The "Today Show" apparently had a segment on TV (which I missed) about some Moms in a playgroup who would have a drink or two of wine as they hung out together and conversed while their kiddos were playing. The show was apparently biased, and made these Moms out to be a bunch of alcoholics who were bad mothers for drinking AT ALL in the presence of their children. there's been a big to-do over this question: "Is it okay for Moms to get together and consume alcohol while responsible for the care of their children?" I am shocked this is even an issue! The Today Show made it seem like this is some new trend, when in actuality it's not. Mothers have been having drinks around their children for decades.

Anyone who reads my blog knows that I'm a big fan of Jose Cuervo. Yes, I drink. Yes, my kids have been present while I'm drinking. No, I don't get drunk while they are awake...I save that for after they've long gone to bed, and I'm not the only person here in case an emergency was to come up. I also don't drink every day...definitely not an alcoholic who HAS to have alcohol to handle my children.

I don't see anything at all with a group of Moms having a drink or two while on a playdate with their children. If I attended playdates, I might even suggest having margaritas together or something while the kids played. It's not like these Moms are there getting completely shit-faced drunk and letting the kids play in traffic. They are having a drink or two and enjoying the company of other ADULTS while the little ones enjoy other kids their size being around to play with. As a SAHM, I understand completely the need to be with other adults occasionally...and if there's a little alcohol involved in the get-together, then so be it.

Of course, the time of day that the playdates are being held makes a difference too. Now, if they are occurring at 9 or 10am, then I don't think it's that appropriate...but in general I think it's in bad taste for ANYONE to be drinking that early in the day, and usually those that do ARE alcoholics. If the playdate is being held at like 4 or 5 o'clock in the evening, then it's a bit different. It makes more sense to me, because it's towards the ending of the busy day when a person may have a drink or two to unwind.

A point that was brought up often in comments on this subject was what makes these Moms having a drink and socializing while the kids are around any different from a family BBQ, where drinks are being served? Also, why wasn't the subject of Dads being in charge of the kids while at a ballgame and having some beers discussed on the show? It seems like it's perfectly okay if the Dads drink alcohol while caring for the children...but Moms?? OH NO! The world will end!! Children will be scarred for life!!

Give me a freakin' break.

One of the questions asked by the interviewer on the show (which happened to be Meredith Veira, formally from "The View".) was, "Would you want your babysitter to be drinking while in charge of your children?" She implied that the babysitter drinking while watching the kids was no different than the Moms watching their own children.

Now, this question has different answers possible. But first...I am NOT a babysitter. Being a Mom and being a babysitter are NOT the same thing. A "caregiver", like in the setting of a daycare, is NOT the same thing either. I was a preschool teacher for 3 years in a daycare setting, and it's just not the same.

As for the have to take in consideration WHO is doing the babysitting. If it's the kids' grandparents or my sister, or somebody I completely trust is not going to let anything happen to my children while in their care, then I don't have a problem with them having a couple of drinks. Not at all. I also know that I'm not going to show up to get my girls and find the grandparents or whoever completely sloshed and the kids playing with the kitchen knives or something. On the other hand, if the babysitter is someone that is being paid to watch my kids for a few hours that I might not know all that well yet, then yeah, I would prefer that they didn't drink during that time. Especially if they're underage anyway. Maybe after the person has watched my kids on several occasions and I'm more comfortable with them, then I might not mind if they had a drink during the evening, but I would probably still prefer that they wait until the kids were in bed.

SO...c'mon...let's discuss this! Go and read the article on the subject on the "Today Show" here. There will also be a place where you can watch the video clip from the segment. Then come back here and let's talk about it in the comments!

Now, if you'll excuse me...I suddenly have the urge to have a margarita. ;)

Saturday, February 03, 2007

More Cuteness from Meghan :)

Wow! Two posts in one day?? I know! I know! Now pick yourselves up off the floor where you just fell down in shock. LOL

I wanted to get this posted before I ended up offline for a bit, but I didn't get around to it. This is another short video of Meghan. She'd been having teething pains when I took this, even though we couldn't see any teeth breaking through. So we gave her an unwrapped popsicle to chew on...worked like a charm! Of course, since she does have SOME teeth already, we had to keep an eye out for potential some miracle she never pierced the wrapping, and just went to town on the popsicle until it was liquid again. Anyway...enjoy! The lighting on this one is a LITTLE better.

Ummm...Hello?? Is This Thing On??

Well, HI! Yeah, I know...y'all have just been sitting on the edge of your seats waiting for another post from me, huh? Sorry about the short absence...First I don't have a whole lot to post about these days, and THEN those dictators down at the cable place CUT OFF MY INTERNET!! The nerve, I tell ya!

ANYWAY...let's see...hmmmm....Yeah, see how boring I am?!? Sheesh.

Well, a week or two ago, we did have some drama with our friends. It's a long story that I just don't have the energy to get into right now, but I'll just say that to help them out, we were letting them stay with us here at our place for a couple of weeks until they found a place of their own. The first few days were alright, I guess...other than the normal losing your privacy thing that happens in situations like that. THEN...they get into this HUGE fight with each other over something that was really stupid, and ended up OUTSIDE our apartment at 4am SCREAMING at each other! Is it just me, or was that just really disrespectful?? They promised it wouldn't happen again, but just a couple days later the same thing happened, except it wasn't 4am this time. When it happened the second time, the manager of our apartments called me and laid into me about them and told me they had to go immediately or else WE would be getting evicted within 24 hours. THAT is some stress I need! Needless to say, they were out of here!

Not much news on the adoption front right now. We had the adoption caseworker call last week to ask MrKB about the restriction on his driver's license. He has a letter from the state of Oklahoma that he has to carry in his wallet at all times. He has this letter because of someone he considered a very close friend stealing his identity a few years back. The friend had a driver's license done up with his picture and all of MrKB's info. Not only that, but ended up giving MrKB a rap sheet several pages long with various crimes. It was all a BIG hassle when we found out about it by chance when MrKB was pulled over for an expired tag. He had to go down and be fingerprinted to prove that he was NOT the person that had done all the stuff on his record, and the restriction on his license states that he has to have this letter they provided to show to any law enforcement officers on demand. The letter basically says that he is who he says he is, and blah blah blah.

Apparently...the adoption process has reached the State level, and the State had some concerns about it, I guess since it's not something they come across that often. Long story short, they wanted a copy of the letter in question, so we've done that, and now are again in the "hurry up and wait" stage. Bleh. Hopefully, this was the LAST piece of paper they need and any day now we'll get the call to let us know an adoption finalization date. Man, I hope so.

In other news, Meghan is FINALLY getting more teeth in! Well, a TOOTH so far. I was starting to wonder if she'd get any more. Remember, she didn't get her first teeth until she was 11 months old, then didn't get any more until 15 months. None since then until now...and she is 21 1/2 months old!! Good grief. It's made for some fun nights for Mama, let me tell ya!

Meghan is also VERY ornery lately. She is quite defiant and really pushing her limits. Frustrating, to say the least...but I know it's a stage she's going through. Doesn't mean I have to like it though! She is also picking up more words all the time, and just a couple days ago started saying "Mommy" instead of "Mama". :) THAT I like.

Destiny is pretty much the same as she has been. I am still aggravated with her daily over stuff she does, and her speech is not much better yet. I wish I could get inside her head for just one day so I could find out just HOW she processes things in there! I don't know how to explain how she is exactly...just that I unfortunately lose patience with her A LOT. I can't help it, and if you knew the things she does, you'd lose patience too, believe me. Anyway, we're working on it! Despite it all, she is still a very happy little girl and has a beautiful smile and is loved very much!

Gotta end this here...I have to run to the store and get some laundry soap. Des is going to spend the night over at my sister's, and we've got a sitter for Meghan. I gotta get them some clean clothes! MrKB and I are going out tonight for awhile, and I can't wait! :)

Oh, by the way....Happy Anniversary to my awesome Mom and Dad!!! Today is their 34th wedding anniversary! I hope we make it that far, and beyond. We must be doing something right so far...our 12th anniversary is coming up on Valentine's Day. :)